Hello ladies, this post is going to be a continuation of my last post. Except this one will be just a little bit more personal. For those of you who don't know, I am 23 years old, about to be 24 in a few weeks. What I'm about to share with you is my life as a 23 year old virgin.

Now I know some of you are thinking, "what is the big deal'? However if you look at the ages kids are having sex at today, I might as well be the 40 year old virgin. Growing up in a Christian household, it was naturally taught to us that you wait to have sex until marriage. Now when you're a child, this doesn't really seem like a hard task. However the older you get, the more you are exposed to, and the more your curiosity grows. For me, even reaching into my mid teens I never felt that pressure to have sex just because everyone else was doing it.


Then my Freshman year of college came. I decided to go to the other side of the country for my first year college experience. Naturally being a college student I grew an interest in a few guys on campus, however that's all they ever were, interests. This is where I experienced my first "pressure moment", and I consciously made the decision not to. Not because I wasn't curious, I mean I was 19, but because I knew that it just wasn't something that I wanted to do.

Fast forward to now, I'm 23 and have been able to hold on to something that I value to the extreme. This hasn't been an easy journey. For as long as I can remember, television has always portrayed sex as "glamorous", but the older I got the more I realized that shows such as "Gossip Girl" wasn't being realistic at all. Let me tell y'all, diseases are very much real, don't be fooled.

I can't tell you how many surprised, and sometimes confusing looks I get when my sexual status is revealed. I'm sure some people have even wanted to ask, "what's wrong with you"? I have to sometimes remind myself that being a virgin isn't something to be embarrassed about. A matter of fact, many girls that I've spoken to wish they could take it back.

Anyhow, now that I am in a part of my life where I'm more interested in dating, I have to realize that the pressure is going ten times worse. Possibly because I'm older, but I have to always remind myself of why I've made this decision for as long as I have. To me intimacy brings two people together like nothing else, and I refuse to give myself and my body to someone who isn't my life partner.

Now don't get me wrong, this isn't easy, and I except that it may not get any easier. I mean I am a woman, and naturally sometimes my body develops certain feelings. It is my job to control those feelings. Believe me when I say "giving it up" isn't going to make you any more of a woman, standing firm in any decision you make is.

To keep it all the way real with you, I've felt like if I made this decision more personal based, I wouldn't feel as bad if something were to happen. As opposed to making it more spiritual based, where as I would feel awful. Sad, but true.

While waiting until to marriage may seem unrealistic to many (and sometimes myself), I do believe that the person you are truly meant to be will respect your decision. Also, this is one way to be assured that whatever future relationship you may have is not based on sex, but on how much this person values you.

Just a disclaimer, this is not one of those "I'm a virgin, so I'm better than you" type of articles. I know for a fact this does not make me any better than anyone else.

If you are a young lady in my situation, please share your journey with me. As always, don't forget to share your thoughts below, I love all your input, including those who may not agree. Until next time:


Photo Credit: madamenoire.com